TEN REASONS WHY WITCHES DON'T WORSHIP SATAN
  10- Scorch marks on the furniture whenever Satan manifests.
   9- Not even Lysol can mask the smell of brimstone
   8- Hard to keep flaming goat's skulls lit
   7- Decreased availability of blonde virgins
   6- Blood stains from the sacrifices are *impossible* to get
      out of the carpet
   5- Wailing of the damned souls in hell keeps the neighbors awake
   4- The cats keep attacking Satan's tail, which annoys him
   3- Repeated stooping motions for administering the Kiss of
      Shame (difficult on the older coven members)
   2- Demons smell even worse that brimstone

   AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON WHY WITCHES DON'T WORSHIP SATAN........

   1- Impossible to worship something that doesn't exist.
      Pagans don't believe in Hell.

      They have something much, much worse--reincarnation.