Halloween Survival Guide -- This COULD just save your life!

When it's Halloween (or close enough to), remember these important tips:

As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that could open portals to Hell.

Beware of strangers bearing tools such as chain saws, staple guns, hedge
trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, or butane
torches.

Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know
what you're doing.

Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.

Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

If appliances start operating by themselves, move out.

If you're running from the monster/killer, expect to trip or fall down at
least twice, more if you are of the female persuasion.

Also note that despite the fact that you are running and the monster/killer
is merely shambling along, it is still moving fast enough tocatch up with
you (ext. Michael Myers Stalk Walk).

If you're searching for something which caused a noise and find out it's
just the cat, leave the room immediately.

If you find a town which looks deserted, it probably is so for a reason.
Take the hint and stay away.

If your car runs out of gas at night, do not go to the nearby deserted
looking house to phone for help.

If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior,
such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing
hairiness, and so on, get away as fast as possible.

If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they
should not know, or if they speak in a voice other than their own, shoot
them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. NOTE:
It will probably take several rounds to kill them so be prepared.

If you find out that your house is built upon or near cemetery, was once
a church for black masses, had previous inhabitants who went mad or
committed suicide, or died in some horrible fashion, or had
inhabitants who performed satanic practices, move out immediately.

Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or anywhere near a grave, tomb,
crypt, mausoleum, or other house of the dead.

Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed
here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Haddonfield, Crystal Lake,
Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the Bermuda
Triangle, Burkittsville or any small town in Maine.

When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if
it's really really dead.

When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off or go it alone!!!